MAFS UK star Mark Kiley has opened up about his father’s suicide and the heartbreaking struggle he’s had with grief.
Mark, 38, who appeared on series eight of the Channel 4 show, lost his father when he was just 20 years old, and turned to alcohol and food to avoid the grief.
Speaking about his beloved father, Mark shared: ‘My dad was a family man. He worked hard to provide for us. He wasn’t perfect, but everyone loved him. He was always the one to make people feel welcomed in our home.’
Despite the love that surrounded his father, Mark felt disconnected from him, admitting: ‘Growing up, I felt different. I wanted to play hairdressers, and dad would let me brush his hair. Looking back, maybe that was his way of trying to bond with me. But during my childhood, I didn’t understand that.
‘We had some good times, but I often felt pushed aside. My brothers bonded with him over things like cars and motorbikes, while I was more comfortable with the women in our family. I thought he didn’t love me as much as he loved them.’
Discussing his father’s mental health, Mark added: ‘He was a man’s man who never showed his feelings. I don’t think he ever got help because he feared being seen as weak.
MAFS UK star Mark Kiley has opened up about his father’s suicide and the heartbreaking struggle he’s had with grief
Mark, 38, who appeared on series eight of the Channel 4 show, lost his father when he was just 20-years-old, and turned to alcohol and food to avoid the grief
‘As he struggled with work and his worth, he began to say things that raised alarm bells for us, like ‘It’s time for me to go’ or “You boys don’t need me anymore.” Looking back, I can see the despair in those words.’
On April 8, 2007, Mark received the devastating news that his father had taken his own life, revealing that it ‘shattered’ his family.
He explained: ‘I was on my way to my nan’s house when I got a call from a family friend asking if everything was okay because the police were outside our home. I thought it was just another family drama. I had no clue what was really happening.
‘I found out later that my brother had discovered him, and it shattered our family. I felt so much anger towards my dad for leaving us.
‘I felt numb. I thought, “What difference does it make? We didn’t have a close relationship anyway.” But that numbness was deceptive, it masked a deeper pain that I was unwilling to confront.
‘The first year was a blur. Everyone kept saying I seemed fine, but I wasn’t dealing with my feelings. When the first anniversary came around, it hit me hard. I realised I would never see him again or have the chance to say goodbye.
‘The last thing I responded to was a text where he said ‘I love you,’ and I ignored it. That guilt became unbearable.’
After turning to food and alcohol to cope, Mark revealed he was hospitalised and was later referred for counselling.
Speaking about his beloved dad, Mark shared: ‘My dad was a family man. He worked hard to provide for us. He wasn’t perfect, but everyone loved him. He was always the one to make people feel welcomed in our home’
Mark was left ‘unemployed and single’ after appearing on Married At First Sight
‘I had numerous sessions and participated in a group. It was uncomfortable at first, but I needed it. I realised I wasn’t alone in my struggles.
‘I take medication, and I’m not ashamed of it. It’s what helps me function. I want others to know it’s okay to seek help. It took me a long time to reach this point of acceptance, to truly understand I am not defined by my grief,’ he shared.
Mark added: ‘For a long time, I was the worst version of myself. Instead of dealing with it, I chose to drown my sorrows, lash out, and blame everything else. I had to learn that grief isn’t something you can ignore, it will catch up to you.
‘Men are often seen as strong, and asking for help can be labelled as weakness. It hurts that my dad felt he didn’t have anyone to talk to about his struggles. I know there are other men who feel the same. We need to change that narrative.’
Mark hopes for a world where open discussions about mental health can lead to understanding and healing, saying he wants to help others with his story.
‘He worked hard for our family and encouraged us to be ourselves, even if we didn’t fully understand it at the time. It’s essential for everyone to know they are not alone and that it’s okay to seek help,’ he added.
The customer service manager signed up for Married At First Sight with dreams of finding Mr Right, and soon tied the knot with Sean Malkin.
Unfortunately the pair’s relationship didn’t work out, with both admitting they were struggling to find an emotional connection.
The customer service manager signed up for the series with dreams of finding Mr Right, and soon tied the knot with Sean Malkin
Mark revealed he’s been forced to take a £7,000 pay cut to return to his old jobs, after hoping he’d be ‘living the high life’ following his appearance on the show
In an interview with The Sun, Mark revealed he was forced to take a £7,000 pay cut to return to his old jobs, after hoping he’d be ‘living the high life’ following his appearance on the show.
He said: ‘When I went on the show, I quit my job and I missed a prepaid holiday that I spent £1,700 on. I left everything to do this, only to come out with nothing.
‘I know it was my choice but it felt like I was mis-sold this dream that it would work and I would say goodbye to my normal life.’
When contacted by MailOnline, a Channel 4 spokesman said: ‘All contributors are thoroughly prepped for the experience of being on Married at First Sight UK, a prominent TV reality series.
‘We stress to all cast that the series should not be seen as a vehicle to gain fame or celebrity and warn against unrealistic expectations of this nature.’
Mark explained that he spent ten years single, and decided to sign up for MAFS UK, but claimed bosses were more focused on ‘creating drama’ than finding love.
He went onto say that bosses took tips from Love Island to boost ratings, and he was told that ‘intruder couples’ would be introduced throughout the series to stir up drama.
Questioning the divisive segment, Mark said he hopes that bosses ditch the idea next series, as it was ‘ridiculous’ entering the process at the halfway stage.
Mark went onto claim that he was given tips by some of the other couples in a bid to get more airtime, and many of the stars were ‘scouted by producers’.
He also claimed that one couple agreed to remain friends early in the process, but kept up the pretence that they were in a relationship to stay on the show for longer.
A Channel 4 spokesman told MailOnline: ‘MAFS UK is very much an unscripted reality series and what viewers see onscreen is an accurate depiction of the cast’s actions and opinions at the time.’
Mark went onto reveal that bosses were forced to tighten curfew rules for the couples after they would stay out partying until the early hours.
Mark went onto claim that he was given tips by some of the other couples in a bid to get more airtime, and many of the stars were ‘scouted by producers’
He said: ‘When the curfew was brought in, you had to be back by 7pm and were allowed to be in other people’s apartments until 10pm.
‘Then the production team would go to check that everyone was in their apartments by knocking on their doors to see if they were still there.’
A Channel 4 spokesman said: ‘Each individual agrees to a standard of behaviour before commencing filming and we take appropriate action on a case-by-case basis if contributors fall below that standard.’
Mark’s time on MAFS UK came to a premature end when he and Sean decided to end their marriage, and he believes his husband ‘wasn’t ready’ for a serious relationship.
He went onto reveal that they are no longer in touch and he has unfollowed him on social media.
Mark said that while many of the couples put on a front that they are all still close pals, in reality he’s struggled to get in touch with many of them.
For confidential support, call Samaritans on 116 123, visit samaritans.org or visit www.thecalmzone.net/get-support
